Guest Editorial

Jane Curtain: And now, with this week’s Editorial Reply is Correspondent, Emily Litella.

Emily Litella: Thank you very much Jane.

Jane Curtain: What brilliant topic are you going to comment on tonight Emily?

Emily Litella: What’s all this fuss I keep hearing about smoking jackets and smoking flowers? Now why would you want to wear a jacket that’s on fire or plant a flower that smokes? I mean, where there’s smoke, there’s fire. Fire burns.

Why, once my neighbor fell asleep smoking cigarettes and burned a hole in his mattress, started the mattress on fire and the next thing you know the whole house burned down. I say there should be no smoking jackets and no smoking flowers!

Why...you could wipe out an entire garden with one smoking flower! They should have No Smoking Jackets, just like No Smoking Sections in restaurants. And they should have No Smoking Flowers because flowers are supposed to smell nice, not like smoke.

Jane Curtain: Ms. Litella…

Jane Curtain: Ms. Litella…

Emily Litella: What? What?

Jane Curtain: Ms. Litella the jackets don’t actually smoke. The jackets are worn BY smokers. They aren’t on fire. And that smoking flower wasn’t really smoking.

Jane Curtain: The clouds above the flower looked like smoke, but they were just clouds. The flower isn't on fire.

Emily Litella: Oh, well that’s different…



Be sure to check out today's posts on my other blogs:

Lola's Diner
Fire Crotch Rocket

Lola's Victory Garden
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